Sunday, September 5, 2010

if i married myself first, would you be my second marriage?

37 comments:

Aisha Rukia said...

hi..i'm new here..hope of guidance to improve my thought..as u do..
hum..my view, i will marry u(with love)..of cos as u married yourself, u'll know much about u better than i am..hopefully u married with the kind of u, and try to improve all the bad things in u..and as ur spouse, i'll acccept u as much as i could..cos i knew u've done the best as for yourself and our family..

anne artist said...

thank you for being a part of the blog!

i am wondering if it is not more of a challenge to be married to oneself......

Alessandra said...

To be married to one self is the height of selfinesh.

Kakay Oloroso said...

i got married with my job before and divorced it... and now i am married with my life which is also myself... and i will marry you, too...

loving ourselves is the first step to love others.

ramps said...

If your first marriage had been arranged you would have learned much that you could bring to fruit in a second marriage.

Sally Ang said...

Would you want me to divorce myself before i marry you as a second marriage??....married myself is impossible ....becos marriage is when two become one .....that is why ....adults leave parents and be with their spouse ....guess i want to be accepted to be your second marriage ....becos.... some personal thoughts (when i baptised into christ...i was married to Jesus)....thus the guy i married will be my second marriage :)

Bleeding Healer said...

if you have married yourself first..does that mean you have already walked down the aisle?And if so does that mean you are already standing there infront of the priest, and I have to walk upto you to reach to you?
And if you have committed to yourself, are you willing to make a committment again?
Bleeding Healer

Nandita Prakash said...

but my question to you is that if u r married to urself, why do u need to marry someone else?believe me, marrying onself is the best combination one can ever get.no other union can be as fulfilling as your relation with urself.have a happy married life & forget the idea of second marriage.

Kaveri Yamuna said...

If your background had not cajoled you to this matrimony of yourself by yourself in a harmonious condition than I am perplexed. WHY seek another to mar your own initial desire.

ROFO said...

haha ! funny idea, marrying yourself!

http://lovers-shore.blogspot.com/

Lazarus Lupin said...

A merry question indeed, would there be a dowry?

Lazarus Lupin
http://strangespanner.blogspot.com/
art and review

anne artist said...

i do like the question," is there a dowry? " thinking about it, i laugh "merrily", as it were.

and i am interested in the points raised. some of us are or have been married to our jobs.......and as we know, the divorce rate there can be quite high.

on another note, i hear chefs on tv speak of "marrying" flavors....the word can take us many places, it would seem.

let's see, if were married to myself, i would be committed to loving myself through crises as well as the good times. i would not run away from myself, either. and there are so many ways to do that. i would show up in my own life.

and i could trust myself to relate to others in a healthy way because of it.

no, i would not need to marry you. would not look to you to complete me and then, at some point, become angry with you because you could not.

and so i come back to the question of dowry......what would be my dowry if i married myself?

Sally Ang said...

Dowry of marrying myself ....is a blank memories cheque, where the bearer is yourself....and the value of that memory cheque, is filled up with the experiences that you go through....in a second marriage, the bridegroom will still need to wait for the bride to arrive at the church, thus at the front of church as he is sure that his bride would not disappoint him.....because time still needs to travel, and becos of that the bride and bridegroom wears both of them a ring, where there is no end nor beginning :)

Sadie said...

Someone earlier wrote something to the effect of being married to yourself is the ultimate act of selfishness, but do we not need to marry ourselves before marrying another? Do we not need to know ourselves, accept both our good and bad, commit to making ourselves happy and care for ourselves before being able to promise ourselves to another? Is being married to yourself an act of selfishness or one of bravery? Brave enough to say I'm worthy of life, love and happiness...

Perception is such an intriguing thing! Very much enjoying this one!

anne artist said...

"an act of bravery"......i do like that, sadie.

perhaps the other commenter defined loving oneself differently. or marriage, for that matter. this can be a meeting place for people all over the world with different ways of interpreting the original question and the questions that emerge from it.

if marriage becomes possession....you are mine.....then would marrying another be an act of selfishness?

Hope said...

Interesting! Thoroughly enjoyed and appreciated all the comments and it got me thinking.
marriage~ the joining of two, to become one
I think if you marry yourself, are you not insinuating a separation of some sort? Possibly a split personality then by all means marry yourself and get it together so you can go off and marry your job, cat or chocolate etc.
For sure, get it together before you consider a marriage of any sorts. :)
just a thought...

anne artist said...

i especially applaud the chocolate idea.....

hope, your comment brings up new questions....are we ever whole......? is life a search for wholeness? are there moments when we think we have grasped it, only to feel it disappear from our outstretched fingers like a gentle breeze?

yet, are we ever other than whole?

Hope said...

Anne artist~ I love your questions! Yes, to them. sounds like the great human experience to me. part of a whole, that is why we keep searching for it. Do you think that whole and home are the same thing?

Lazarus Lupin said...

I am often hole, and a hole is always hole as there is never a half a hole. The question is would it be a second marriage if you married yourself first then another. However, doesn't that beg the question, can you ever divorce from yourself? If not it wouldn't be a second marriage but a polly wanna cracker gamey situation.

If you are into that thing, that's cool.

Lazarus Lupin
Art and Review
http://strangespanner.blogspot.com/

PS: "Never reap what you can sew, never chew what you didn't choose, never bet the devil your head even on the spread, and never deny destiny even if you have to make it up as you go along." Again: "Never reap what you can sew, never chew what you didn't choose, never bet the devil your head even on the spread, and neve deny destiny even if you have to make it up as you go along." Today's colour is blue. Today's author is not. That is all, maho maho.

anne artist said...

hope, interesting that you would ask.....right now, more than anything, i have been focusing on "home" and "whole" being the same thing. i have been experiencing a tropical storm outside my windows unlike anything i can remember.

ironic that it came in the week i asked the question about streams and waterfalls. at any rate, i do believe i would not rather be a tropical storm. and i do have added respect for the trees that stayed "whole."

anne artist said...

lazrarus l, i suppose a hole has the advantage that it can't be other than hole. unlike a whole for which that added letter creates an opportunity for math skills.....the whole is greater than the sum of its parts, as the saying goes.

and i wonder if some if not a lot of people do, consciously or unconsciously, try to divorce themselves from themselves. to marry another on the rebound, as we know, is just courting trouble....

i believe i will rewrite my destiny to include blue since it is the color of the day and regard it as a lovely color for the sky which will return again without the winds and rain.

Lazarus Lupin said...

anne in all seriously ness
you are a lovely person
and an artistic soul in an artic world
don't change except when you want to!
Keep up the good work!

anne artist said...

thanks, l.l.

although i wonder if i am not like the river one never steps into twice. there is so much new ness in each moment and so it seems, the steps to the dance change accordingly.

thanks for being part of the dance.

Que said...

I really like your blog,it's way differnt than anyone else's.You speak your thoughts in a very poetic way.

anne artist said...

thanks!

Bridget McCullen Carrick said...

A marriage should help you grow as a person. But if I am already married and committed to myself--meaning that I am loyal to myself, I will always love me no matter what I do, I will challenge me to be a better person--then what can a second marriage offer to anyone else? In theory, the second marriage would be fruitless in the end. I could not commit myself to another if I commit all of me to me.
But life is not theories. We can never truly commit ourselves to just one person, whether it is ourselves or others. Life is a whole bunch of marriages. The challenge is to commit to the important ones. Ones as in plural.

Bleeding Healer said...

Hey I gave you an award, but I am new at this so just check if I did it right.Congrats.
And Keep posting.

Bleeding Healer

anne artist said...

thanks! however, i have no idea what you mean by an award!

keep commenting! you make a difference....

Bleeding Healer said...

an award is like an appreciation token, only virtual. Like a certificate for you amazing blog, an act of appreciation. Check my blig, you will understand my wise friend. =]
Bleeding Healer

Sally Ang said...

Guess in marrying myself first,i had enjoy the marriage so much with love in it ....and thus in having a second marriage ....we can give much joy and love to the other marriage....with another....and while i am neither waterfall nor river ....i can still be the blue sky that oversees the wonderful world below me....and guess being the blue sky....i am married to sun and clouds ....having the clouds dance over me and having sun shine through me .....Anne, thanks for the dance, i enjoyed it ....will look forward to your next creation .....and another question ....:)

anne artist said...

i visited your blog and read about the award. i was amazed at what you have created. your words are beautiful and deserving of an award themselves.

it is indeed an honor and a most cherished gift to have received your award.

perhaps you are starting a new trend.....if we each gave awards, then maybe the world would spin just a little bit differently..........

anne artist said...

sally ang, your comment felt like poetry....i loved traveling with your images to the clouds and then back down to earth just in time to dance.....

Jim said...

I am not committing matrimony, ever again!

anne artist said...

not even with yourself?

i am wondering how you mean "commit"....as in make a decision firmly or in the sense of it being a crime......

Jim said...

Myself and I are legally separated.

anne artist said...

not to be personal...who got the house?

beyondenigma said...

Hi... I'm little new in posting comments...
I think your dimension of thinking is great since to marry oneself means to value oneself. And only when we learn to love ourself then we'll learn to love others. have a look at my blog:
http://beyondrakesh.blogspot.com/2010/08/insight-into-aloneness-loneliness-love.html#more